Monday, November 8, 2010

George Foreman Grill - A Guest Rant

The following post is from my colleague Stephen M. Raymond who is the first guest contributor on "Blog! There it is..."


The year is 1994, a mere two years away from the Blizzard of ’96, and the last year the New York Islanders were any good. This also happens to be the year that the bane of my existence was created. I was only 8 at the time, and I could not fully foresee the long term consequences of my parents bringing home the clam looking piece of kitchen equipment dubbed George Foreman’s Lean Mean Fat-Reducing Grilling Machine. According to Wikipedia, The link between the boxer and the grill came about soon after George Foreman’s remarkable comeback when in 1994 at the age of 45 he regained the heavyweight world championship. He attributed his success at the time to his healthy lifestyle and his healthy eating which made him a perfect fit for Salton Inc. who were looking for a spokesperson for their fat reducing machine.

Fast forward 16 years. What was true then is true now: while convenient to use in college for grilled cheeses, the lean mean fat reducing monstrosity should have no place in any post collegiate residency. My hatred for the machine stems from my roommates constant use of it. While i don't possess the same one my parents owned 16 years earlier, my roommates grill maintains the same original design. There is no other piece of kitchen equipment that is cleaned less frequently, nor is there any man alive that likes plain, flavorless burgers as much as my roommate.

What keeps this item on the market? Is it the sewer grease receptacle at the bottom that catches all the flavor and is never cleaned? Or the fact that the house smells like you just cooked a burger with an iron? Or, is it the windex flavored grilled cheese after you finally clean it? I swear, if I come home to a crusty greasy clamshell 6 or 7 more times, I am going to think about finally doing something about it. I guarantee it.

1 comment:

Doe said...

Raymond, I assure you that in the proper hands, that piece of equipment can be used for good and not evil. With a little bit of trial and error, I could be firing medium-rare steaks out of that little guy. Not that I'm offering. Just saying.